Psalm 3 - Obstacles, Fears and Dreams...Oh My

“Anyway”

You can spend your whole life buildin'
Something from nothin’
One storm could come and blow it all away
Build it anyway

You could chase a dream
That seems so out of reach
And you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway

This worlds gone crazy
And it's hard to believe
That tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway

You can love someone with all you heart
For all the right reasons
And in a moment they can choose to walk away
Love 'em anyway

God is great but sometimes life ain’t good
And when I pray
It doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway
Yeah I do it anyway

You can pour your soul out singin'
A song you believe in
That tomorrow they'll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway
Yeah sing it anyway

I sing
I dream
I love anyway

The author of this song is obviously an optimist. One that chooses to not let life hold them captive, but instead chooses to live life to the fullest despite insurmountable odds. This is exactly how I want to live my journey, with a passion to pursue my dreams and my call without reservation. This is not to say that you live without regard to those who are part of your journey, you just don’t let them be the director of your dreams. You have those trusted friends that you look to for input and advice, but you must in the end be responsible to follow your heart. I am learning to not be a constant victim of what has been the primary inhibitor of my journey thus far – FEAR. I think everyone battles fear to some degree and in some cases it can even be our protector. Fear, much like pain, can even be a good thing when it is channeled as a healthy respect of harmful influences or situations. It becomes unhealthy when it totally rules our lives and is the loud voice directing all our decisions. I know that some of my biggest fears have been of failure and of rejection. To not try is to not fail. But then again your life is then void of the incredible excitement of having lessons learned from experiencing challenges and discovering ways to overcome them. Plus, you have robbed yourself of any opportunity to experience the joy of unexpected success. I have lived much of my life replacing the last line of each of the verses to “So don’t risk it anymore”. I have viewed the courage of others who dared to dream and venture into the unknown and see themselves experience the satisfaction of at least knowing they have tried and given their all even if the outcome was not exactly what they had set out pursuing. Sometimes their roads were diverted into amazing adventures that they would not have experienced had they never risked. Sometimes there is indeed “failure”. But which is the greatest failure? To love and lose or to never love at all? I love the song “Unwritten” –

"Unwritten"

I am unwritten, can't read my mind,
I'm undefined
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We've been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can't live that way

I am trying to discover what has conditioned me to think that I can’t make mistakes. I don’t want that perfectionism and fear to define and limit my journey. I really can’t live that way anymore. I am beginning to free myself from the chains that would allow my arms to be wide open to possibilities. There are still pages in my book that are unwritten. I don’t want them to stay blank due to the paralyzing grip of fear. I want to choose to embrace possibilities and view failure, not as failure, but as a redirection of the path of my journey. After all, “every new beginning starts with some other beginning’s end”.